Sometimes us drama queens can get SO caught up in our negative thoughts, that we end up making life harder for ourselves in the process. You feel like ALL you can do is complain, moan and worry about something, only to realize that the simple solution was right in front of your nose the entire time.
The same exact thing can happen to the role that
plays in our lives.
We all want to be happy, right? The pursuit of happiness is a lifelong goal, and many of us would do just about anything to get a glimpse of it.
But that’s the thing – the “pursuit of happiness” isn’t a pursuit at all! I challenge you to retreat from happiness, starting today.
Because Happiness has been in front of your nose this entire time.
I went through an awkward stage. I think it’s safe to say that we have all spent at least one year of our lives as a gawky version of current selves. My moment came in the heart of fifth grade. I grew much more quickly than my other female classmates,
and boy was I reminded of it
I remember sitting in the cafeteria eating lunch and hearing girls taunt me with the lyrics of Sir Mix-A-Lot’s “Baby Got Back”. Thank God they didn’t understand much more of the song than
“I like big butts and I cannot lie”…
but that was all they needed. They would sing and laugh and look right at me, making a huge scene in front of the entire lunchroom until a teacher would shoo them away.
I remember being frozen to my chair, not wanting to get up until everyone else had left for class, afraid that people would start pointing and laughing at my rear-end again.
And it didn’t stop there.
Ummm…can you say AWKWARD?! Circa 2001.
I remember signing onto AOL instant messenger (my screen name was BroadwayBabe2008, do you remember yours?) and having someone named ‘BroadwayFag2008’ request to talk to me. My naive 7
grade mind accepted their request, and they proceeded to spew nasty words and slurs at me, naming my home address, and threatening to burn down my house.
My best friend had transferred to a different school, and they would make fun of her, reminding me how alone I was without her, reminding me that I had no one left.
And I would go to school the next morning and would sit out in the car with my mom for as LONG as possible, trying to stay away from those hallways that were full of mean glances and feet that would try to dart out and trip me.
I remember working in the front office and having one of the office aides look up the class schedule of a particularly cruel girl, so that I could make sure and plan my route to avoid her in between classes.
my art teacher to let me eat lunch in her classroom, doing anything that I could to avoid sitting in the cafeteria alone.
I remember being really upset and trying to keep my eyes from tearing up one morning as I was practicing my Science Fair speech with my teacher. She could tell something was wrong and she wouldn’t believe my excuses when I said I was fine. Eventually I told her about the online threats and she got the school technology adviser to track the IP addresses of the bullies.
Ends up they were the same girls that sung the mean songs in the school cafeteria years before. Go figure…
I don’t mean to tell these stories to sound depressing. Lord knows my bullying stories are barely the tip of the iceberg compared to some experiences kids endure at school…
But my heart still pounds in my chest whenever I see a picture of the old AOL instant messenger Buddy list.
Whenever the “Baby Got Back” song comes on, most people my age laugh and sing in 90s nostalgia – but I just can’t get myself to dance along.
Over the years I’ve learned to embrace my curvy figure, learned to love it even. But man oh man, did that take a
long. long. time
And that’s the thing. Bullying never really leaves you. If you’ve ever been bullied, those moments are forever crystallized in your mind.
If you are told that something is wrong with you enough times, it’s easy to start to believe it. The bullying begins to live in your mind and it sets up camp in your heart.
And I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be that way.
Fifteen years after being bullied, I’ve had a good amount of time to sit back and reflect on that time in my life. And I’ve learned some very important things…
That no matter what stage you are in your life, you can erase and reverse those thoughts, and defeat the inner-bully that the REAL bully left behind.
Do you remember reading the book
in Elementary School? Besides the fact that my 10 year-old-self was proud of reading a chapter book, I fell in love with this story.
It was about a boy who came up with a new word for “pen”, and he managed to convince a bunch of people to start using his new word instead. As a young writing nerd, I thought that this idea was just the coolest thing
And as I’ve grown older, I’m continually fascinated by words and their meaning.
And I realized over time that I couldn’t find a way to describe the type of incredible change I longed to create in the world. I learned that not only did I want to fulfill my dharma and bring my dreams into reality, but I wanted to support others on their personal journeys as well. I wanted to create exponential dreaming. I wanted to ignite explosive positivity and action that would seep into the lives of thousands of people. But I didn’t have a way to describe this incredible thought in my mind.
workout DVD a few years ago for Christmas. It’s been collecting dust on my shelf, (Why bother with workout DVDs when there’s millions of free workouts on
!?) but I finally decided to give it a whirl.
And let me tell you, holy moly great balls of fire! That DVD kicks my ass! I have to practice Lamaze as I try to walk down the stairs or sit on the toilet – my whole body aches with soreness.
Considering it’s called “30 Day Shred”, I imagine Jillian designed this workout to be completed in 30 consecutive days.
But that’s where I draw the line.
Call me a big loser, but when I recognize stress, I
that my body needs time to rest and recoup. Because rest plays an important role not only in our physical lives, but our mental and spiritual lives as well.
I consider myself a lot of pretty impressive things – but an athlete is not one of them.
The only physical game I’ve ever won was dodge ball back in 5
grade. And to be honest, it’s mainly because the boys took each other out one by one, leaving me to win by default. I was a cheerleader in high school, but it was for the
cheerleading squad, which (I’m not gonna lie) was kinda known for being the less talented of the school cheerleaders. It was basically just glorified dancing, no tumbling knowledge required.
All this being said – I honor my body’s need for exercise.
And that’s what is great about exercise. You don’t have to have balance (I fall over just standing up sometimes, so good thing!), you don’t have to have speed, or any real skill to start. You can take it slow and build those qualities as you go – that’s the point.
There’s only ONE thing you
have to have
before you can start a workout program. It’s not bulging muscles or a firm booty – in fact, it’s not even something that you can see!
It’s the proper mindset.
Without a mindset that is focused and determined to stick with a workout plan, the only progress you’ll see is your stomach
to a larger size!
So how can we prepare our minds for a healthy exercise program? And most of all, how can we use our minds
while we exercise
to make the most of our workouts?
I have 4 mindful exercise tips that I am going to share with you today that will transform the way you view your workouts. These are workouts FOR THE SOUL.
I’ve been watching a lot of
lately. It’s a Showtime TV series that centers on a blood splatter analyst who leads a secret life as a serial killer.
I will admit, this show
stresses me out
It’s not that I’m afraid for Dexter (I mean, his name is the title of the show – I doubt they are going to kill him off any time soon…well, wait
that was purely a guess
… I’m only on the 4th season… oh no… don’t give it away!
Dexter be careful!
I’m stressed because Dexter is AWFUL at organizing his life. I don’t worry about his crimes… I get stressed when he leaves his child with the nanny for too long. I get stressed when he doesn’t show up to work on time because he was off riding in his boat. Mainly, I get stressed because Dexter has tried to divide his life into perfect little pieces (no pun intended…
), and he finds his life constantly crashing down around him.
Dexter, buddy, can’t you see the full picture!?
Which makes me think, don’t we all try to do the same? We compartmentalize our lives on a daily basis. We have our family, our friends, our romantic partners, our career, our personal development, our homes and our health. We have these segments in our lives that we must juggle, and sometimes it’s easier to divide them into separate entities. Sometimes it
easier to handle them that way.
But just like Dexter, therein lies a fatal flaw. Here’s why segmenting your life could cost you your happiness
The south side of 37th Street, between 5th and 6th Ave is my favorite street in all of New York City.
If you live in NYC, or you’ve visited – there is a very good chance you’ve never been on this street.
It’s dirty and filled with Midtown hotels and cheap wholesale clothing stores that sell nothing but fur or beads.
But a walk along this street has the magic to transform my day.
Without having to think about it, I’ve created a gratitude habit SO STRONG that it jars me out of worrisome thoughts without the use of my conscious attention. This habit has put my ego in its place. And it’s a habit that we
have inside of us.
And in this kick-butt SlideShare, I’m going to show you exactly how you can harness the power of your own daily routine to create a habit for unprecedented abundance in your life.
Buckle up and join me on the Pathway to Gratitude!
I’ve never traveled the world. In fact, I’ve never even ventured outside the United States. I know, it’s a little embarrassing to say out loud.
But thank God for the internet and all the technology that allows us to connect worldwide each and every day.
And it just makes me think…THERE IS SO MUCH OUT THERE IN THIS WORLD.
Millions of people are living out their moments in time every day. By that fact alone, we are all so incredibly connected.
What series of events had to happen for you to find yourself reading this post, on this website? Every choice you made today has led to this very moment. Take a deep breathe and soak it in. This is
incredible life to live.
Now that’s what I call a WHOA moment.
And boy oh boy, do I live for those moments!
Whoa moments can be best described as those periods in time where your mind can briefly comprehend our place in the grand universe. Those moments of awe while overlooking the Grand Canyon. I’ll never forget the time when I was reading
and for a brief smidgen of a moment, I was able to wrap my mind around the fact that time is relative and all that exists is the present moment. No, I wasn’t high on drugs. I was running on a treadmill, to be exact. But I’ll never forget that WHOA moment for as long as I live.
Wait But Why just published a
about “whoa moments” and how they connect us to our highest selves. I strive to be in a state of awe, each and every day. It’s all just too beautiful to fully comprehend.
But WHOA moments are only little blips in time. And once they pass, the reality of our world becomes glaringly apparent.
For example, I’m not a fan of the nightly news. In fact, it’s probably the most depressing thing you could watch on television. I make an effort to stay informed on current events, but I don’t let them consume me. I choose to send a prayer out to those in need, and focus on
deflecting that negative energy
I know why news outlets exist. They aim to inform, but ratings always seem to win in the end. An anchor makes a hurtful sexist or racist remark, and the video goes viral. Their audience craves staggering numbers and incredible circumstances.
But what if we all chose to focus on
We seek to share it with others, we relish in it, we are made of it, and we want more of it. To give and receive love – it’s the best feeling in the world.
But what does love
to you? How do you feel it; how do you show it?
For me, it’s the act of giving and receiving
. I picture it like this: Remember when you were a kid and you would spin your straw REALLY FAST in your chocolate milk until you created a mini tornado in your cup? Love is just like that. It’s giving and receiving in a continuous circle, until you get so caught up in it, that you BECOME it. You realize that you ARE love; A tornado of pure, positive energy.
That idea is the exact inspiration behind the Soultiply logo. A sacred circle. Giving and receiving all wrapped into one.
I just love that idea!
But I find this interesting…when most people are asked,
“What do you love?”
oftentimes they name only
I love my mother.
I love my brand new puppy.
I love my house.
We know the miraculous power of love, that’s a given. So why don’t we automatically extend these feelings to our non-physical ideas and beliefs in just the same way? Why don’t we make more of an effort to give love to our dreams or to our obstacles? What if we loved the things that don’t yet exist with just as much passion as we do our family and friends?
What would become possible?
It’s that time of the year again, folks. People are starting to get the sniffles.
I was stuck at home for two days this past week fighting off a nasty cold myself.
And although I would have much rather spent that time getting some real work done, there
one tiny silver lining to a sick day stuck at home. As I was cuddled up with 4 different blankets (no joke!), and a nose to rival Rudolphs’, I couldn’t help but realize how it takes catching a no-good virus to get me to slow down and rest a bit.
Sometimes, when you have a low-grade fever and absolutely ZERO energy, you can experience a serene sense of calm that’s hard to achieve during the hustle and bustle of a normal day. The other things just don’t seem to matter – all you are focused on is resting and feeling your best again. I always feel extremely connected to my body and spirit when I feel ill, my mind just isn’t up to the task of dealing with the usual worry and chatter.
In fact, I remember
back in my acting days
, I would give some of my best performances when I had a fever. I just didn’t CARE how I was doing, so the performance was natural and uninhabited.
But living a direct and simple life doesn’t have to be a byproduct of catching a cold. In fact, it might be one of the greatest things we can do to help us stay healthy, sane, and focused on the things that matter most.