I’m sure it needs no introduction, but the
Humans of New York blog
kicks some serious booty. It reminds us of our fragile humanity, how everyone has a story, and how when it all comes down to it – we fundamentally want to help one another.
It’s the happiest place on the internet.
And what’s more than that – it’s a blog that has seriously changed lives.
Take, for instance, the current saga centered around a young man named Vidal. I won’t get into all the incredible details, (
you can find them here
– and I urge you to do so!) but Vidal is a young man that Brandon (the founder of Humans of New York) met on a street in Brownsville, Brooklyn. Brandon asked him who the most influential person has been in his life, and he mentioned his school principal, Mrs. Lopez. To make a very long and incredible story short, Humans of New York was able to raise
over a million dollars
for Mrs. Lopez’s school, send Vidal on scholarship to college, and inspire a nation. In fact, Vidal & Mrs. Lopez recently had the opportunity to visit the White House and meet President Obama! And to think that all this powerful change was initiated by a principal that dedicated her life to creating scholars; that the catalyst for this greatness was an intelligent young man, honoring the individual who taught him that he mattered.
I dare you to look through these posts and not cry tears of joy.
It’s a very New York City mindset to think that you can do it alone.
We all float around this city in our own little bubbles, eyes glued to our cell phones, trash and slushy snow biting at our feet. It’s easy to feel like you are alone in this winter dystopia, especially when the subway is crowded, rent is due, and you have
no clue what you want to do with your life
But if you manage to look up for a second, to recognize the warm bodies around you, and to acknowledge the supportive people who stand by you no matter what – your whole life can change.
I went through an awkward stage. I think it’s safe to say that we have all spent at least one year of our lives as a gawky version of current selves. My moment came in the heart of fifth grade. I grew much more quickly than my other female classmates,
and boy was I reminded of it
I remember sitting in the cafeteria eating lunch and hearing girls taunt me with the lyrics of Sir Mix-A-Lot’s “Baby Got Back”. Thank God they didn’t understand much more of the song than
“I like big butts and I cannot lie”…
but that was all they needed. They would sing and laugh and look right at me, making a huge scene in front of the entire lunchroom until a teacher would shoo them away.
I remember being frozen to my chair, not wanting to get up until everyone else had left for class, afraid that people would start pointing and laughing at my rear-end again.
And it didn’t stop there.
Ummm…can you say AWKWARD?! Circa 2001.
I remember signing onto AOL instant messenger (my screen name was BroadwayBabe2008, do you remember yours?) and having someone named ‘BroadwayFag2008’ request to talk to me. My naive 7
grade mind accepted their request, and they proceeded to spew nasty words and slurs at me, naming my home address, and threatening to burn down my house.
My best friend had transferred to a different school, and they would make fun of her, reminding me how alone I was without her, reminding me that I had no one left.
And I would go to school the next morning and would sit out in the car with my mom for as LONG as possible, trying to stay away from those hallways that were full of mean glances and feet that would try to dart out and trip me.
I remember working in the front office and having one of the office aides look up the class schedule of a particularly cruel girl, so that I could make sure and plan my route to avoid her in between classes.
my art teacher to let me eat lunch in her classroom, doing anything that I could to avoid sitting in the cafeteria alone.
I remember being really upset and trying to keep my eyes from tearing up one morning as I was practicing my Science Fair speech with my teacher. She could tell something was wrong and she wouldn’t believe my excuses when I said I was fine. Eventually I told her about the online threats and she got the school technology adviser to track the IP addresses of the bullies.
Ends up they were the same girls that sung the mean songs in the school cafeteria years before. Go figure…
I don’t mean to tell these stories to sound depressing. Lord knows my bullying stories are barely the tip of the iceberg compared to some experiences kids endure at school…
But my heart still pounds in my chest whenever I see a picture of the old AOL instant messenger Buddy list.
Whenever the “Baby Got Back” song comes on, most people my age laugh and sing in 90s nostalgia – but I just can’t get myself to dance along.
Over the years I’ve learned to embrace my curvy figure, learned to love it even. But man oh man, did that take a
long. long. time
And that’s the thing. Bullying never really leaves you. If you’ve ever been bullied, those moments are forever crystallized in your mind.
If you are told that something is wrong with you enough times, it’s easy to start to believe it. The bullying begins to live in your mind and it sets up camp in your heart.
And I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be that way.
Fifteen years after being bullied, I’ve had a good amount of time to sit back and reflect on that time in my life. And I’ve learned some very important things…
That no matter what stage you are in your life, you can erase and reverse those thoughts, and defeat the inner-bully that the REAL bully left behind.
I’ve been watching a lot of
lately. It’s a Showtime TV series that centers on a blood splatter analyst who leads a secret life as a serial killer.
I will admit, this show
stresses me out
It’s not that I’m afraid for Dexter (I mean, his name is the title of the show – I doubt they are going to kill him off any time soon…well, wait
that was purely a guess
… I’m only on the 4th season… oh no… don’t give it away!
Dexter be careful!
I’m stressed because Dexter is AWFUL at organizing his life. I don’t worry about his crimes… I get stressed when he leaves his child with the nanny for too long. I get stressed when he doesn’t show up to work on time because he was off riding in his boat. Mainly, I get stressed because Dexter has tried to divide his life into perfect little pieces (no pun intended…
), and he finds his life constantly crashing down around him.
Dexter, buddy, can’t you see the full picture!?
Which makes me think, don’t we all try to do the same? We compartmentalize our lives on a daily basis. We have our family, our friends, our romantic partners, our career, our personal development, our homes and our health. We have these segments in our lives that we must juggle, and sometimes it’s easier to divide them into separate entities. Sometimes it
easier to handle them that way.
But just like Dexter, therein lies a fatal flaw. Here’s why segmenting your life could cost you your happiness
We seek to share it with others, we relish in it, we are made of it, and we want more of it. To give and receive love – it’s the best feeling in the world.
But what does love
to you? How do you feel it; how do you show it?
For me, it’s the act of giving and receiving
. I picture it like this: Remember when you were a kid and you would spin your straw REALLY FAST in your chocolate milk until you created a mini tornado in your cup? Love is just like that. It’s giving and receiving in a continuous circle, until you get so caught up in it, that you BECOME it. You realize that you ARE love; A tornado of pure, positive energy.
That idea is the exact inspiration behind the Soultiply logo. A sacred circle. Giving and receiving all wrapped into one.
I just love that idea!
But I find this interesting…when most people are asked,
“What do you love?”
oftentimes they name only
I love my mother.
I love my brand new puppy.
I love my house.
We know the miraculous power of love, that’s a given. So why don’t we automatically extend these feelings to our non-physical ideas and beliefs in just the same way? Why don’t we make more of an effort to give love to our dreams or to our obstacles? What if we loved the things that don’t yet exist with just as much passion as we do our family and friends?
What would become possible?
Your friends can be a huge blessing to you and your professional success, but it takes a
of friendship to make that positive switch. Not everyone can be a friend with (BUSINESS!) benefits…
Over the past several days, we’ve been climbing up the business/friendship ladder. We learned how to navigate the oftentimes rough relationship troubles with the
, we’ve supported the scattered dreams of our
friends, and we’ve thanked the many
that keep us motivated and inspired to do our best.
But do you know the type of personal relationship that brings the MOST business success?
For a young professional, oftentimes your career is your heart and soul. So think of an Observer friendship as the blood that keeps the heart thumpin’ and pumpin’! Let’s delve deep into what it means to be a great friend and business Observer…
You can either A) Desperately try to control everything and never ask for help from others (any of my control freaks relate?? Why do we do this to ourselves?! B) Work with random people who have no sense of your vision, or C) Find people who inspire us, understand our dream language, and help us reach those goals while enjoying the process along the way.
I’ll take C – please and thank you!
And oftentimes, the people that fit the bill ALREADY EXIST in your life.
They are right in front of your nose for crying out loud!
They are your best friends!
But sometimes navigating the blurry line between personal and business relationships can be a difficult task, so in this series we are looking at the top 4 archetypes of personal to business relationships, and the best ways to transition them for professional success. We will take a look at:
For the past several months or so, I’ve made a huge effort to be more of a social person.
I’m one of those gals who is perfectly happy with spending the evening in reading a book or writing a blog post, wearing my wool socks and not a spot of makeup. I despise the bar scene and it’s like pulling teeth to get me to go out on a Saturday night. (Why do I live in NYC again!?) I swear, when I get married, I honestly think my Bachelorette party will consist of a crafting circle and loads of great wine. That’s just who I am!
Needless to say, my friends are not often pleased with my anti-social tendencies.
But I love my friends, and those relationships mean the world to me. You won’t hear me ever discount the joys of a proper work/life balance; I’ll always have time for my buddies.
But now that I run my own business, many of these friendships have taken on new meaning. And I’ll admit, some for the better…and a
for the worse.
But it got me thinking, where is the fine line between a personal and business friendship? Is it possible to have both at the same time? And if so, how can you balance the two without jeopardizing your existing relationships along the way?
For the next four days, I’m going to delve deep into 4 of the most prevalent personal-friendship-to-business-relationship types out there. You’ve met these people – hell, you might BE these people! We’ll meet…